Open Letter

Dear Mark,

About a month ago, I saw you in an airport. You were standing in a café waiting for your coffee and breakfast sandwich, as it was about seven in the morning. I heard the barista bellow, “Mark” when your coffee was ready, and I saw you reach forward to get it. I recognized the heavy steel ring on your finger as it grasped the paper cup. You looked unremarkable. I wonder if anyone else recognized you as the “cussing pastor” as I did. The pastor I followed and defended and felt like I “knew” when really you probably didn’t even know my name.

I don’t know if you saw me, or knew who I am, or that I attended your church for twelve years. I don’t know if you recognized me as the person who taught the preschool class your son was in that one time. I don’t know if you knew it was me who wrote that email to you about Genesis 50, the one you personally replied to. That was before the church was so big you had people check your emails for you, I believe.

I just wanted to say, thank you. Thank you for abandoning your church. Thank you for putting money over people, a sin you committed in private that eventually made it’s way public. Thank you for leading your church into the ground. That’s on you.

Thank you for all this, because now I know who are my real friends, my real family. I know what true community is, and it has NOTHING to do with all of us believing or doing the same things. It has NOTHING to do with all of us going to the same church or being in a community group together. It has NOTHING to do with how often or how much I serve someone or be served by someone.

Thank you for these things, because now I know what a healthy church looks like. Now I know what a healthy pastor looks like. Not you. A healthy pastor doesn’t look like how you pastored. I also know that there is no perfect church, but there can be unhealthy, bone-draining churches.

If I had been less “starstruck” (for lack of a better word) that morning in the airport, I would have approached you. I would have expressed how the time spent at your church was the best and worst of my life. That I’m glad all that shit went down a few years ago because it woke me up from the sleepwalking faith that I had.

I don’t want to see you again ever, but if I do, I will tell you these things. I will expect you to respond like a sheep, like you never did anything wrong, like you were framed for those things that ripped apart thousands of lives. You will continue to play the humble “I’m like Jesus” card when you are anything but.

You will be held accountable as a pastor. You preached on that yourself, to impart a holy fear to men who aspired to the clergy. Listen to your past sermons, Mark. God miraculously used your words to turn thousands of hearts to Him. But you tried to get the glory, not Him. And HE will not have any of it.